step one
get your butt out of bed! don't lay in it. seriously. that's such a bad idea. force yourself to get up. since yesterday you took a shower, today just... get up. put on some make up, i put on the exact same thing i wore yesterday. i like it because my ex (now named mr. wrong) didn't like it when i wore shorts or low cut shirts. (barely low cut, and not even short shorts. PFFT WHATEVER) so im wearing a v neck and my little blue high waisted shorts. at 9:00 am i got my ipod and walked to not the nearest coffee shop, but one that was at least a 10 minute walk away. i listened to the following song
and then
because it's kind of an f-you song, and every girl can relate? kinda? in a way? i can. it's not about a lover, it's about another female friendship.
i got an iced vanilla latte. since i am one who completely loses her appetite while in the midst of boy drama, i felt i could use the calories of the vanilla and whole milk. the good thing about going to the place i went to is that my vancouver bff works there. so we chatted, she gave me a hug and looked pretty proud that i was up and chipper.
step two
take the long way back, chat to neighbours, etc. i listened to this song
and then
i talked to my usual starbucks barista who was sitting outside on her break. i told her that boy i always came in with was a loser, and we were done, so she won't be seeing him around. for the first time i said it with a smile, i didn't tear up (win!!). we chatted about which coffee places are actually kinda better than starbucks.
step three
today i have to be a tough bitch and go to work. i didn't know how i'd make it those three days without it, but i'm here now and tonight at 4:30 i'm going to get my ass on the bus and go to work. i'm going to be okay. but before that i'm going to get a cute little dress to wear.
TIP OF THE DAY<3>
i don't think by day 4 you should listen to sad music. save that for much later, when you're stable (you wont feel the need to by then anyway). i don't feel quite stable yet. it's a fine balance between avoiding the feelings and not letting them debilitate you. if sadness or anger comes, take them in, deal with them, but don't do things to CREATE these feelings. try to do things for yourself, and keep busy. i only tell you to do this because it seems to be working for me.
recommended read
exercise of the day!!
i'm going to make a list of things i can do now that i'm a triple s. (single sexy siren/stud). every day i'll try to do one. the list will expand, or change. and it's going to be hard with my trip to toronto coming up, but i'll try!
go on a trip with bff lisa (she goes to europe and mexico because she's a triple s.)
go on a trip with bff maya (her parents have a house in kelowna, and she's
make myself look like the babe i am and go out dancing with bff's amy and sharlena
go to the art gallery (on my own or with a date, even a friend date)
get my hair done at bang town
go shopping and buy whatever i want. (mr. wrong liked to tell me how i should dress)
get my nails did (why not?!)
see broken social scene (www.brokensocialscene.ca) on oct. 13th
re-decorate apartment
change up my room
and finally... go to new york city with bff #1 nicole. and be triple s's together. BECAUSE WE ARE.
chat time
i have to say that focusing on my future really makes me feel optimistic. i won't say it's easy though, when my mind switches back to how things were between me and mr. wrong, it sort of becomes a downward spiral of emotions. i'm trying to trick myself by calling him mr. wrong, so it gets drilled into my head somehow that he is in fact totally wrong for me. we are wrong for each other. i would be better with someone else. someone who has my 6. even though he was only missing one thing (not the gorgeous one, unfortunately), without that feature we didn't work.
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